[019] I hear with my eyes
Biweekly Articles Sending Positive Messages Into Negative Spaces
Marumarum is a publication focused on sending Positive Messages Into Negative Spaces.
We share biweekly, brief articles on various topics aiming to shed light on a new aspect of life.
-Parker
[019] I hear with my eyes
Sitting in school, at work, or even walking around a grocery store, when we look or stare in a general direction and accidently look into someone’s eye we feel that social tension with us. Yet when someone won’t give us eye contact in situations of needing comfort it can be disrespectful and we might feel annoyed. Our eyes are a powerful tool of communication that we can use in combination with speaking and listening to connect with others and become better listeners.
With our eye-to-brain connection, we are able to reflect the colors and shapes around us into recognizable forms. Without effort, we naturally are able to do this so when we look at the face of someone, we are able to recognize a connection to them. Our emotions use our eyes, eyebrows, and surrounding facial features to tell others what we are thinking even sometimes before we know ourselves. Learning to find comfort with eye contact is difficult but helpful in gauging someone's engagement levels in a conversation.
“Eye contact is a powerful visual cue for building social links between communicating partners. It has strong influences on several perceptual processes in communication, such as face detection, gender perception, and facial expression recognition” RESEARCH PAPER: Neural mechanisms of eye contact when listening to another person talking
In conversation, our eyes play a vital role in conveying our emotions and how engaged we are in the conversation. By continuing to give our eyes to something else while we try to give our ears for listening, we miss out on the opportunities to sincerely listen and absorb important social pieces of information. Giving our eyes to conversations can build connections and indicate our interest levels [see here]. Some benefits of eye contact result in an improved retention rate from conversations, we are more likely to remember faces, we are more likely to understand what people say, and we display confidence in those who speak. Yet with eye contact in conversation, too much or too little can cause social awkwardness.
For example, when a coworker interrupts us mid-task or a family member enters our solace, we typically have the choice to multitask or pause and give them our eyes. By stopping what we are doing and initiating eye contact we acknowledge their presence, give them permission to speak, and establish trust. This is all due to the power of eye contact
To ease ourselves and those we talk to we can aim to make contact roughly half of a conversation with emphasis on eye contact earlier on to show our intention and interest. By using gestures we can naturally disengage eye contact and engage when we are ready. When giving eye contact try to look between their eyes or maybe just past someone too. If we want to become better listeners and show our commitment to being intentional with others, eye contact can be a challenging yet rewarding practice.
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[+] Article: Interesting read about Netflix and other streaming services subscriber counts and streams here
[+] Video: Sheena Lyenger talks about the art of choice in this Ted Talk.
[+] Painting: Beach at Cabasoon (Baigne-Cul) by Henri Edmond Cross, 1891-92, is currently on view at the Art Institute Chicago.
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[+] IG video with Animated mockup tips here
[+] Inspiration: from are.na a channel by Tess Murdoch: open letters to soil
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[018] Organizing Digital Spaces
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Marumarum is a publication focused on sending Positive Messages Into Negative Spaces. We share biweekly, brief articles on various topics aiming to shed light on a new aspect of life. -Parker